rant, Wanda will not be appearing) Tickets: Available through Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox box office at 624.1200 or from TicketsWest by phone: 800.325. SEAT(7328) or 509.340.6700, online: ticketswest.com, or at the Bing Crosby Theater Box Office, Monday-Friday 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Location: Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox, 1001 W. Sprague Ave., Spokane Sponsored by: Planned Parenthood of the Inland Northwest www.ppinw.org and wandasykes.com
by Joan Opyr
Old people are fascinating!
savvy to the joint. I told him, politely, to knock it off. When he refused, I reminded him that this was a nursing home and not a strip club. That's why I don't get tips, and he doesn't get the rectal thermometer. Quite apart from the intrinsic value of the work, not a day goes by when there is not something worth recording in the nursing home. The elderly are fascinating. They've lived long, full lives, not much shocks or surprises them, but they take great delight in shocking and surprising you. A woman in her mid-80s gave us a disquisition at lunch on gay marriage. The theme? Why should anyone care if gay people marry? Who are they hurting? She thinks the people who are opposing us are too young to have any perspective. "If they were a bit closer to death, or had Parkinson's or an artificial hip, then they'd really have something to worry about, and they'd leave other people alone." Old people are fascinating -- a rich vein for the writer to mine. This is the best day job ever. Q
6pm Dangerous Dames: Starring Jerry
Halliday [Please see ad on page 6]
Puppetry at its finest. Adult entertainment, not for the kids Cost: $15 Tickets: Available from TicketsWest by phone: 800.325.SEAT(7328) or 509.340.6700, online: ticketswest.com, or at the Bing Crosby Theater Box Office, Monday- Friday 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Location: Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague Avenue Sponsored by: Friends of Spokane AIDS Network and Dempsey's Brass Rail 2-7pm Odyssey Family Reunion & Open House Odyssey Youth Center invites former youth, volunteers, staff and community supporters to join us for an Odyssey Family Reunion and Open House. The Open House will take place at Odyssey Youth Center from 2-4pm. The Family Reunion and barbeque will take place at Grant Park (a few blocks from Odyssey) from 4-7pm. Food. Music. Lots of fun. Cost: Free Time: 2:00pm-4:00pm Open House, 4:00pm7:00pm Family Reunion and Barbeque More Info: Sandy at 509-323-2306 or email@example.com for more information or to help. Location: Odyssey Youth Center, 1121 S. Perry Street - 12th & Perry and Grant Park, a few blocks from Odyssey Sponsored by: Odyssey Youth Center www.odysseyyouth.org
ost writers have day jobs. Unless we're lucky enough to have caught a popular wave of some sort -- boy wizards, romantic vampires, or terrifying fathers with psychic sons snowed in for the winter at a Colorado hotel -- we have to think of some way to support our typing habit. It isn't always easy. Some of us do a lot of freelance work. We write humor columns and do interviews. Others go into technical writing, and even more of us do some mixture of freelance and "real world" work. Not long ago, I added CNA to my collection of jobs. When I'm not writing, I'm taking care of the elderly in a nursing home, a job that is more than paying back in the writing department. For example, I was working with an Alzheimer's patient who was adamant that his car had been stolen. Rather than argue with him, I asked him to describe the make and the model. He thought for a moment, looked at me, and said, "How the hell should I know? I've got Alzheimer's." I have a tiny little woman who calls me Chauncey. This is so we can run off to Hawaii together. We were planning our escape and lunch one day, and she asked me my last name. When I told her "Opyr," she tried spelling that a couple of times and said, "No, no, that won't do. I can't go anywhere with a name like that." I asked what name she could go with, and she said without missing a beat, "Chauncey." I have been groped in the nursing home. I was bending over to take an old man's blood pressure when, like lightening, he reached out with his free hand to cop a feel. By this time, I was getting
6pm th Annual Stem and Stein
[Please see ad on page 14]
5th Annual Wine and Beer Tasting Fundraiser to benefit the Spokane AIDS Network. There will be cheese pairings, chocolate pairings with Halletts handmade chocolates, a live auction, and a silent auction. Cost: $40 in advance, $45 at the door Tickets: Tickets may be purchased from The Spokane AIDS Network, 905 S. Monroe St., phone: 509.455.8993 or from TicketsWest: 800.325.SEAT(7328) or 509.340.6700, online: ticketswest.com Location: Northern Quest Resort and Casino, Pend Oreille Pavilion, 100 N. Hayford Road, Airway Heights, WA 99001 Sponsored by: Spokane AIDS Network www.san-nw.org or www.stemandstein.org
Joan Opyr is a gigantic crank. Her life is frequently weird, and she enjoys writing and talking about that. She's a transplanted Southerner who dreams of golden beaches, sweet iced tea, and sunny skies. She believes that Eva Cassidy should be beatified. Oh, and she's also an award-winning novelist.
www.qviewnorthwest.com | Q View Northwest - Spokane Edition | June 2009 |